Referrals are the easiest, warmest, and most profitable leads you can get. But if you’re not getting them consistently, you’re not alone.
Many agents assume referrals will “just happen” once they’ve helped someone buy or sell—but that’s not how it works. Getting consistent referrals takes intention, communication, and a few key systems.
Let’s break down the real reasons you’re not getting more referrals—and exactly how to fix it.
1. You’re Not Staying Top of Mind
Most people aren’t thinking about real estate every day—but you are. If you’re not showing up regularly in your clients’ and sphere’s world, they’ll forget what you do… and that you’d love a referral.
“I didn’t even think of you!” is the #1 most painful thing to hear from a past client.
Fix it:
- Email your database monthly with helpful tips, market insights, or local updates
- Post consistently on social—not just listings, but stories, closings, behind-the-scenes
- Engage with other people’s content on social media, it helps with the algorithm and makes them feel seen, heard, and special
- Send personalized texts or notes to your top contacts at least once per quarter
You don’t have to be spammy—just visible.
2. You’re Not Asking (the Right Way)
Asking for referrals feels awkward for many agents. But top producers know: the ask matters. If you’re vague or hesitant, people won’t know what to do.
“Keep me in mind!” is easy to ignore. But something specific like…
“If you hear of anyone at work thinking about selling this summer, I’d love an intro—I’ll take great care of them.”
…is clear, confident, and easy to follow through on.
Fix it:
- Practice simple referral scripts until they feel natural
- Use calls, emails, or handwritten notes to plant referral seeds
- Time your ask—right after a great experience or review is a perfect moment – how about after they get the “Clear o Close” and they’re excited and happy?
- Fit it into a conversation naturally – ask them how work is going, if they’re a good conversationalist hopefully they will ask you how work is going in return. This is your opening into telling them how real estate is going (always be positive, but honest). Then, make the simple ask “If you hear of anyone that’s thinking about buying or selling, I’d be honored to help to them”. Then turn the conversation back to them.
3. You’re Not Creating “Wow” Moments
If your clients have an average experience, they’ll forget it.
If they have an outstanding one—they’ll tell people.
Referrals come from emotion. If you create memorable moments, people talk.
Fix it:
- Deliver small surprises: a welcome-home gift, closing-day photo, or unexpected handwritten note
- Be fast, clear, and proactive with communication
- Help solve problems before they become issues
People refer when they’re impressed—not just satisfied.
Remember: the referral isn’t about you, it’s about the person they are referring to you. They are referring them to you because they believe that you are the person that can help them.
4. You’re Not Systematizing Your Follow-Up
Referral generation can’t depend on your memory. It needs a system.
If you’re not tracking your past clients, checking in regularly, or organizing your sphere, you’re leaving opportunities on the table.
Fix it:
- Use a CRM to schedule check-ins and track birthdays, anniversaries, life events
- Add notes to the CRM after a conversation, log what you talked about. This way you know what to talk to them about the next time you call them. It no longer feels like an awkward cold call, it’s a friendly check-in. Basically, you’re building a dossier about each client. (think, the “Book” in The Devil Wears Prada, become the Miranda Priestly of real estate.
- Create a referral follow-up plan (e.g., touchpoints every 60-90 days), set reminders
- Segment your contacts by likelihood to refer, and focus more energy there, use the Mayor Campaign concept by Brian Buffini to sort your database
Systems turn “should’ve” into action—and action leads to referrals.
Final Thought: Referrals Don’t Just Happen. They’re Earned—and Encouraged.
The most successful agents don’t leave referrals to chance. They train their clients to send them, by showing up, adding value, and making the ask.
You don’t need more leads—you need better relationships. Build those intentionally, and referrals will follow.
Want to Build a Referral Machine That Runs on Autopilot?
At Baird & Warner’s Frankfort office, we don’t just tell our agents to ask for referrals—we coach them on exactly how to earn them, systematize them, and turn their sphere into their #1 lead source.
We provide:
- Proven scripts that make asking feel natural
- CRM systems and touchpoint topics
- One-on-one coaching to build your personal referral plan
If your current office isn’t helping you build repeat and referral business, let’s talk.
👉 Reach out today for a quick coffee chat and see how we’re helping agents at every level grow smarter.
ACE - Agent Coaching & Elevation 
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